chemo – Sharon O'Connor

“You Had a Really Hostile….

by Sharon

Published September 13, 2024

… abdomen.”

The doctor doing morning rounds kindly and efficiently shared details about the previous day’s surgery. I’m a pretty laid-back person. Don’t get hostile about much… but am dedicated to avoiding medical intervention. When doctors are needed, I go big. Thanks, abdomen.

“We had trouble getting to the cyst because you had so much scar tissue. You had what we call a hostile abdomen, probably from your previous radiation. The cyst we eventually removed took up much of your pelvis, but there is no cancer.” I would go home the following day. A miraculous difference from years ago with the first open surgery, a long hospital stay, cancer treatment, and more surgeries to follow.

Have you ever asked God for help with something, and discovered he was giving you an assignment to work through as part of the answer to that prayer?

This past spring I was driving or doing makeup before work or something mundane.

“God, would you help me get healthy?”

I went on about my day. I was having what seemed like endocrine issues or maybe thyroid stuff. I added in specific essential oils and supplements based on nutritional scans. I felt better but decided I needed get my act together with some cardio and losing weight. Overall my body has carried me well for the fourteen years since the first colon cancer diagnosis, the return of colon cancer in 2012, and being declared cancer free in 2013. Work life balance had blessedly arrived in 2024. It was time to get more proactive physically going into the next decade.

In July, probably two months after my quick prayer about getting healthier, I went for a gyn exam. You know, not feeling any issues, but maybe it was time for blood work to check thyroid levels. I spent about six months talking myself into that visit. The July gyn visit found a 10 cm cyst and set in motion a flurry of tests that caught me up in every category. Bloodwork (including thyroid) = good. Colon = clean. Mammo = clear. Cyst = hopefully, oh God please, would it be benign, or push me back into dealing with cancer? I and my family worked through fears and dread and trust and waiting on an answer with the news of this cyst. Would I be healthy? Are my fears unfounded? Or was this process just a mean thing to go through again, a distressing development after being cancer free so many years? I know God doesn’t work in mean ways; sometimes my mind does.

A referral sent me to a surgeon out of town. The beautiful sign at the office said “Gynecology Oncology“; Tom and I both almost fainted at that second word. My dormant white coat syndrome came right back and sat beside me.

Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. Hebrews 4:16

In late August 2024 I showed up for surgery to remove what we hoped would be a large benign ovarian cyst, and to rule out cancer. This was the exact same scenario we tumbled into during 2010, except they weren’t sure where the cyst or tumor was located.

I woke up this time to the incredible gift of no cancer, and surgery was able to be done laparoscopic instead of open.

I felt like I had gotten away with something.

Moving forward, I have every confirmation and incentive to be healthy. I am grateful for the medical team God used to help me, starting with my own phenomenal gyn doctor, and the specialty team she sent me to for gyn surgery.

Two of the ways Webster defines “scar” include “a mark remaining (as on the skin) after injured tissue has healed”, and “a lasting moral or emotional injury”.

Here are thoughts on how God worked over the past few months helping me face emotional scars and the removal of extensive internal physical scar tissue:

We have to want to be healthy.
Once we ask for help, be ready for God to lovingly and effectively deal with the scars. They may be ones we didn’t know we had, or ones we didn’t realize were limiting health.
Allowing God to deal with our scars can be really scary. Will it hurt? Will there be more pain? Will it create more issues than it solves (if you’ve been through health challenges, you get it). What if it’s easier to just leave the scar tissue instead of removing it? We’ve become used to each other.
Scars are protective and restrictive.
The process of confronting and removing scars, while painful, positions us to move forward in better health.
God lovingly helped me work through many fears going into this surgery. I would have had the same fears to work through no matter the outcome. I can tell you that my hope, my security, and my joy is in the presence of God every day. He has proven himself to me not so much in the outcome for which I prayed, but in the journey of learning who He is today and into an eternity. I love him and trust him.
My body will fail someday, but my eternal soul is secure because of Jesus Christ. If you would like to know more about the God of hope, please visit https://www.peacewithGod.net.

Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand. Psalm 73:23

The photo at the top of the page is my husband’s hand holding mine. We started a habit of praying together at the start of the day back during cancer rounds one and two years ago. This photo is from Summer 2024 when contemplating whether we were walking towards cancer round three. The picture of Tom holding my hand is a sweet reminder that God is always with me, with us. Isn’t that amazing?

God holds us by the hand no matter how deep and unseen the scars we carry or hard difficulties we face. He is for you. Trust him with your scars.

Other info:

Things I did in the month before surgery to prepare:

Myrrh and Sacred Frankincense essential oil on my abdomen with a rice heating pad before bed (after about a week, I felt far less pressure on my bladder – the cyst was sitting on top of my bladder based on CT imaging).
Castor oil pack over my liver/abdomen 3-4 times weekly (may help detox the liver, which in turn helps the liver function better, and may help break down cysts).
Deep Spectra Phyto Nutrition essential oil blend taken daily, 20 drops in water.
Thyromin, Super B, and Progessence Plus taken daily for thyroid, endocrine and adrenal support.
LifeWave X39 Patch begun two weeks before surgery to help promote wellness before and healing after surgery. Honestly it helped my anxiety about surgery, as well.
I eliminated most meat, dairy and processed foods.
Dropped to one cup of coffee daily with organic creamer (with my hubby in the morning; it’s our time to get ready for the day; the picture at the top of the page is from our prayer time together). Caffeine strains the adrenals.
Started walking one mile per day 4-5 times per week.
I lost about seven pounds before surgery and felt good going into the procedure.

Things I’ve been doing after surgery:

Daily iTovi nutritional scans for guidance on which oils would support my body. Lots of specific hormonal and structural support going on with some emotions tossed in!
Deep Spectra Phyto Nutrition essential oil blend taken daily, 20 drops in water.
Thyromin, Super B, and Progessence Plus taken daily for thyroid, endocrine and adrenal support.
LifeWave X39 Patch daily for healing at the cellular level (think, stem cells), and the addition of the Aeon patch for hormonal support, stress support, adrenal support, and inflammation support.
And other things nutritionally with lots of rest, gratitude, prayer, hope, and relief.

Follow me on Instagram for things that encourage me and may encourage you, too.

Field Journal

70/30

by Sharon

Published August 5, 2024

“Well, then that makes it 70/30 towards open surgery instead of 50/50.”

Two weeks of medical tests, spikes of PTSD plus anxiety wrapped in a history of hope, and three anxiety-induced high blood pressure readings taken late July in the new surgeon’s office, were bringing us to the next step. I would be having surgery in August 2024 to remove a grapefruit-sized ovarian cyst. A mid-July CT scan confirmed the cyst, and showed an additional 1.3 cm something behind or at the edge of the cyst that needed to be identified. Thankfully, every other test came back with no indications of cancer. No tumor markers, no issues in my colon like fourteen years before. No necrotic lymph nodes shutting down a kidney like twelve years before.

So what was this new thing? Scar tissue from radiation was the most hopeful option ringing the bell in my corner. Can we just run with that? Across my mental boxing ring pranced the real possibility of a new cancer. Surgery would determine the winner.

The surgeon continued reviewing my history. We negotiated to 50/50 on whether he would find cancer or not, and 50/50 on whether he could do the surgery laparoscopic or not.

I mentioned that I’ve had radiation not once, but twice. He turned.

“Then your previous radiation and scar tissue from abdominal surgeries changes the odds. Chances for an open surgery are more like 70/30.” I blanched. More high blood pressure.

“Do you have to do open surgery?”

I had tried to bargain with my first oncologist on whether I really got cancer for a lack of chemo in my body. Any other options? At all?

The surgeon looked me straight in the eye. Fair and direct.

“If I get in there and need to do open surgery, it is because open surgery will help protect you from needing a colostomy or from possible damage to other organs.”

Let’s not do a colostomy again, please. We’ll do it however you determine when you get in there, sir.

“I understand.”

Tom and I left the office. He drove. I began making a mental list of everything I would begin doing to help my body prepare. Can we dissolve a 10 cm cyst in four weeks and clear a 1.3 cm something? Is that a thing? God did it before. Sharon, He also used medical treatment to help. “Lord?” Fine. You’ve pointed us in this direction. Surgery prep it is. Let’s go.

If you’ve read this far, hello and thank you.

My family and I have had a few weeks to move from, “This sounds horribly like dejavu – a benign appearing cyst that turns out to be cancer,” to, “Ok, this is a different thing; lots of women have ovarian cysts… we know what this is and where it is … and many women need surgery… maybe they haven’t all had radiation twice but who’s counting… and perhaps God is taking care of this thing now and getting it removed so you keep moving forward with living and healing and embracing the hope that has carried us all the past fourteen years.”

I’ve pondered about what and how to share. I mean, I had an entire blog filled with writing that helped me cope with cancer. I revamped, removed, and finally recently put this blog back together wondering what, in the world, I should blog about (ha). I’ve kept key things from previous blogs here because sometimes people will ask me and really want to know what I did that helped my own 2010-2013 cancer healing journey. There are things the cancer journey taught me – losses, wins, and truces – that I never want to forget. I also never want to go through it again. I dread another major surgery.

Does this new thing need to be shared with the world? Not sure. My emotions are complicated. Do I need and appreciate prayer? For sure. Does writing about it help me? Oh yes. What would God like through this? I don’t know, but my eyes are on Him.

Today a friend texted me to ask how I was doing. She did not know I was thinking about whether I should be writing down this latest challenge that, by all appearances, could turn out fine. A bump in the road. However the last three weeks have reminded me and my sweet family that bumps, benign or not, are capable of pulling us back to the anxiety, stress, discouragement, and reality that disease can be life changing. But so can hope be life giving. God has not changed. His love, care, and mighty help will not change. I and my family have a peace about this situation. I want others to know the God who can give peace in turmoil.

Does a new chapter about hope ever get old?

My friend, a masterful writer of encouraging posts herself, texted, “Here’s an encouragement… Only you (and the Lord) can say when it’s time if it’s time to share. If God is doing a new thing with your old story … don’t feel bad about sharing it … if you want. Someone will hear it for the first time.”

What has God given you to share about hope? Someone may need to hear it! (Including me.)

Remember your word to your servant, for you have given me hope. My comfort in my suffering is this: Your promise preserves my life.

Psalm 119:49-50